My Aunt, best friend, co-worker, life-saver, sounding board..my heart...just found out that she has cancer. So she's dealing with the decisions about what to do as her next step.
After she left, I cried. She's my heart. Over the past 2 years we have gotten so close working together for my second job. (We have lived next to each other for 20 something years). She's the one that stays late at work so that I can go to a writer's group meeting, critique meeting, night classes, attend a writing workshop, etc. She's selfless and I take way to much advantage of her.
I love her to pieces. Here's a pic of her at Christmas time:
Having this happen has opened my eyes, has made me realize that I can't keep putting off the things I don't want to deal with hoping I'll have a chance to fix them later. Because we never know if there is a later. And I want to live the life I want now rather than hoping and dreaming for it later.
So, Nona and I have made a promise to each other to take a step towards a more healthier "us." So we'll vent, rage, motivate, cheer, etc., to and for each other. Tomorrow will be my first day. (So I can still have whatever I want today. ha! Always find a way to beat the system!)
All jokes aside, its back to Weight Watchers and making better choices. (no more pecan pies at Picadilly - sigh). A few weeks ago I was talking to someone and they asked if I had kids or a husband. When I said 'no' to both, he asked what was wrong with me. Now what kind of a question is that?!?
Needless to say, part of my problem with being in a healthy relationship isn't my weight from the guy's perspective but more my weight from my perspective. And its my psychological issues, and losing weight will not make my "problems" go away since I still see myself as I see myself.
But at least I'll be able to walk in Crissy's wedding in May and not feel too much like a nightmare in the bridesmaids dress. And at least I'll be able to go on vacation with Stacey and Lauren and not need a nap in the middle of the day when we take Virginia, Pennsylvania, Washington DC by storm in April.
So these are my goals and I'm sticking to it, one day, one pound at a time. Going through my goals from the beginning of the year, here's my last attempt at this same goal:
I started a new art journal on...witches. And you use the words on the page to make some little saying or sentence to associate with the work on the page. This one says "cow, cow, hide the old witch" so I used the skinny cow symbol (lol I love that skinny cow) and the old witch being the old me.
So anyway, here's to better choices. Starting on 10/12/08.
Words Written Today: none - I lived! I went to watch my niece play in a volleyball tournament.
- ► 2009 (30)